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  • Writer's picturejimurbanlife

Circular Force

Updated: Mar 20, 2023

My eyes suddenly open. My body lies still. I exist in mild consciousness reflecting on my return from the immediate journey. I seem to be frozen and limp while I mentally try to gain traction of my thoughts — wondering where I am. I feel I’ve been floating from place to place seeing all that I love, yet more important all of those that love me…

Was this a physical or spiritual journey of sorts? I find myself walking on the damp streets with a sense of confusion, mixed with moments of clarity, while not seeming to be completely awake. It seems strange, as the air carries a warm breeze, yet it’s nearly Christmas 2019.

My eyes take in the color of the gloomy, early morning with a vivid sharpness as I strain to see someone familiar. My walk turns into a jog, as my sight continues to search, moving into an outright run. It suddenly occurs to me that I may be running in the wrong direction, yet I’m certain it’s a circle track.

I remind myself not to panic or to be overly concerned — direction isn’t always determined by me, yet a force more powerful, so the circle continues. This seems like a rerun of events. I realize that my skin is beginning to thin and my hair is turning grey, my legs are weak and my arms are tired, but the mind is strong though still uncertain of the correctness of the direction, as there are so many paths, yet a circle still.

So I’ll continue moving forward at all costs trusting in the powerful force that guides me. The next awareness is about how long can I run, longer than before, is this just the beginning? Am I almost fini

shed? Only the force will know — thoughts come as knowing — the force decides no matter how weak or grey I become.

I must keep going forward, around the circle. Yes, while I continue to embrace the people, places, and things that I love; but more importantly, those that love me…

Yes, those that love me…

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